So, I just got back from MSGS in Minnesota, and ive had a very mind captivating 4 days. ive had about 7 or 8 hours of sleep collectivly, my brain and body are completly numb. Im not going to get into specifics as to what went on at con mostly cuz those thing are for me and me alone. but i would like to share my frustrations and feelings from those events.

one of my first identifiable feelings was the insane need to do something productive, to just change my pace and do somthing i love. i was surrounded by arrogant pseudo intellectual "contemporary" artist. which is another way to say a fucking jack off who thinks two tvs hooked up facing each other with a dude licking his own ass while making dying gazelle noises, some how constitues some remote talent. which for the record IT FUCKING DOESN'T. all that means is you have an affinity for panera and barnes and noble and like to talk about the industrial revolution as if you were actually there. So, guy, who ever you are, wherever you are, please, in the kindest way possible FUCK OFF. there are a lot of things i can appreciate, but that chia pet of an ass crack wiping against a video recorder somehow doesnt quite hit me the right way. in fact your kind of that obnoxious kid who asked to may dumb questions in grade scgool and got beat up a lot. but i digress, basically what passes as "art" today is pretty much an excuse to come up with some jack ass situation like a glass shattered on the ground and making it represent how stalin killed all of his own people by cutting off food and water supply and how hilter and disney both hated jews. its impractical, its nonsensical and its a poor excuse for self expression. its has nothing to do with talent but finding regular shit and turning it into something more because of your ever vast knowledge of the inner workings of society and history. so once again fuck off.

the point is that im tired of people becoming successful because they want to jump on the band wagon of the so called "revolution". I realized i want to persure somthing worth while and I intend to do it without starving a dog or being a complete incompitent floppy dick. so yeah thats the first one. I could go on, but you know, I will pretty much have a book by that point and i should just get it published. I will call it it. "Brian sees truth in life.hilarity ensues"

so I felt pretty tired most of my time at MCAD and honestly i wanted to go to relax and ended up working the whole time, which is ok, i just didnt anticipate going the way it did. I also drank to much and blacked out and Im just so fed up of this little funk im in i could just start killing things. but dont worry, im sure ill take a picture of my nuts, enlarge it, and put it on the front of walmart and call it "walmart, inches from the chode" that way i can go down in a super awesome artistic way. *cough* oh excuse me i just vomitied a little in my mouth.


So on my way home i was just thinking about how much I was going to miss my friends and more importantly being the hell out of iowa. but I really started to think about it, and im not sure its iowa, im not really sure what it is, it just seems to be a staleness in the air and its really is almost palpable. So I don't know what im gonna do, and i dont know when but i think its time for a change, a trip a year vacation, whatever, but i know i'm, going to do it, and Im gonna do it without making goddamn gazelle noises while licking my own ass.

on a litghter note, thanks for letting me stay up there, i had a great time. and I hope I can come see you guys real soon.